longer.blue

Last week, we featured a rather inflammatory essay by a well-known critic of the ultra-wealthy and their outsized influence over mass media and politics. In the interest of balance, we've asked the esteemed banker Pemberton Coldwell-Fitch to provide the rebuttal which follows. COLDWELL-FITCH I will endeavor to keep this short since I am a busy man and have many important responsibilities. Last week, this outlet provided a platform for an extremely disturbed individual, allowing him to amplify his disdain for the very wealthy and blame them for many of the problems in our nation. Following, I will offer responses to each of his criticisms. To wit: He alleged that the good and decent people of the United States were deceived and manipulated to vote contrary to their character and values, that respected media outlets owned by the ultra-wealthy have become nothing more than purveyors of propaganda, that segments of the population have had their opinions influenced by the media such that they vote against their own decency on behalf of an ultra-wealthy elite. He further alleged that the ultra-wealthy control the politics in this nation. Politicians are provided financial assistance to their campaigns on a quid pro quo basis. Thus, in his telling, the politicians act on behalf of their donors, regardless of whether the policies are beneficial to their constituents. Policies are enacted to favor the wealthy while extracting wealth from the lower levels of society. He accuses companies of pursuing AI and Robotics with wild abandon, not to simply improve productivity, but to eliminate millions of employees and replace them with machines. Furthermore, he attacked what he called "the surveillance state," alleging that sophisticated data aggregation and artificial intelligence systems, such as Palantir, will be used by a hostile government to track the activities of all citizens, identify dissidents, create blacklists, crush dissent, and enable the Administration to remain in power indefinitely. Poppycock! As a very wealthy person myself, I take exception to his malicious attacks. He, and others like him, are bums, expecting handouts and failing to realize their lot in life is their own responsibility. Wealth is acquired through skill, intelligence, and hard work. We pull ourselves up by our bootstraps. We have the same opportunities that are available to all. It is our superior acumen that allows us to distinguish ourselves from the masses. If we occupy a privileged place with greater power, it is because we deserve it. Our experience ensures that we will make the best decisions. We may be born into wealth, but that does not shield us from the vicissitudes of life. I too have known adversity. I was accused of attempting to rape a girl at a high school party. Though I can't remember the incident, it is impossible that a person of my station in society would attempt such a thing, especially if the girl were still conscious. The unfounded allegations from female subordinates, the frivolous indictments — these, and much more, show that it is indeed the wealthy who are persecuted. We own social media sites, newspapers and magazines, radio and television stations. The companies that send your e-mail, allow you to speak with a distant loved one, provide chats where you find an answer to most any question. We do this out of civic duty, love for humanity, and because we profit immensely. We take our ownership of media seriously and ensure that the content reflects our noble aspirations for society, because it allows us to shape this nation in the way God intended. We know it is His Divine Will that we prosper. We do not deceive people, we instruct them. The alleged manipulation is merely the result of proper instruction, insulating the naive viewers from subversive voices and facts that might upset them. We are job creators; notwithstanding, we will dispose of them at the earliest opportunity in the interests of our companies. Companies are the lifeblood of our nation. They pursue profit with the vigor of a wolverine in mating season. The profits earned are distributed to our shareholders as dividends or an increase in the value of our shares. Anyone, from the lowest homeless person to the pizza delivery person, has the opportunity to buy shares in our companies and benefit from our success. We donate extensively to like-minded politicians, though they may not be like-minded prior to our donations. We do not expect them to act in our interests, we expect them to act in the interests of our nation, though, almost without exception, the interests of our nation are identical with our own interests. This brings us to the current environment in which our President is subjected to the most vile and unrelenting criticism. The President has been described as an ignorant, racist, misogynistic, cruel, violent, immoral, unstable, childish, vindictive, sociopathic, corrupt, incontinent, malignant narcissist with dementia. While I do not dispute this — he may have the morality of a pimp and act like a carnival barker — the policies he has enacted are in the best interests of our country, so he deserves our respect and obedience. Lower taxes for the ultra-wealthy are simply a token of appreciation from a grateful nation for our immense contributions. Medicaid, Medicare, Social Security, SNAP, the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, and the rest are all designed to provide to citizens that which they have failed to provide for themselves through their own mistakes, sloth, and lack of intelligence. The funds that are freed up allow us to invest in our businesses and in new technologies such as AI and Robotics. AI and Robotics promise to usher in a new golden age. Millions of employees will be released from the burden of their daily jobs to spend time with their families and pursue creative activities. They will have the chance to do what we have done — pull themselves up by their own bootstraps, start a company, and enjoy the satisfaction of standing on their own two feet contributing to our nation. If any of them lack the resources to start a company, they can simply obtain a loan from their parents. Finally, and this cannot be stressed enough, comprehensive surveillance of the citizenry is intended for the security of all. Those who have done nothing wrong have nothing to fear. Undesirable immigrants can be located by their complexion, their names, or spoken language and be repatriated or otherwise disposed of. Domestic terrorists can be identified and eliminated — the authorities will define what a domestic terrorist is in an appropriate way. Those who promulgate subversive ideas can be quarantined, like the contagion they are. A series of camps have been established throughout the country, administered by the trusted Immigration and Customs Enforcement Agency. The purpose of the camps is not punitive, though that may be an unintended benefit. The camps will allow occupants to engage in useful work which will eventually lead to their freedom. As Ayn Rand observed, the titans of finance and industry are like the mythical Atlas who supports the entire world on his shoulders. Let those who criticize us know that Atlas may one day let loose his burden and allow it to roll into the abyss — then you will have only yourselves to blame.